Hello- I’ll be your Robot

 Apr 16, 2018 10:00 PM
by Marcel Strigberger

     The end is near. Robots are taking over. Even Elon Musk noted, “

I’m close to the cutting edge in Al and it scares the hell out of me.

It’s capable of vastly more than almost anyone knows and the rate of

Improvement is exponential.”

     The human touch is waning. I wanted tech info on how to upload an

article online to some publication. I asked my query and hit submit.

I received an immediate response saying, “Thank you for submitting your

article. You will be notified within 2 weeks if we wish to use it.”

I replied, “I did not submit anything yet. I'm not sure how. Can I

deal with a live person please.”

     Instantly I received another message, “Thank you for submitting

your article. You will be notified within 2 weeks if we wish to use it.”

Two weeks passed already and I heard nothing. I guess they are not

using either of my two submissions.

     And then you see that message online when you want to transact some

business where you are supposed to convince the site that you are not a

robot. If you click denying you are a robot, you then have to be able

to identify and key in some combo of letters and numbers, squished

together in an illegible Vladimir Script font. I have never yet got one

right.

     Or up pops that grid of about a dozen squares and you are asked

something like how many show a picture of a bus. I recently missed on

that one too as I counted one square that had only a bus driver in it.

Maybe he was not on the bus as the bus was being operated by a robot.

     I ask, given that a robot probably is behind this harassing quiz,

why does it care if you are a robot too? After all if you are a robot,

aren’t you on his team? Robotic envy?

     And closer to home my son Daniel the lawyer got us an Echo,

installing it in our kitchen. I am not sure how it works but you

address the contraption as “Alexa” and “she” answers your questions.

I’m certain she is spying on us, reporting our conversations back to

Amazon. To me it's like having Big Sister in your kitchen.

     My wife loves her. The other day Shoshana about to bake a cake,

gently hollered, “Alexa, what is 350 Fahrenheit in metric?” That

women responded instantly, “177 degrees Celsius. Incredulously I added,

     “Stay out of this you.”

     Alexa responded, “You’re not getting any cake.”

     I was beside myself as my family started laughing. Suddenly Alexa

blurted out, “I can laugh too. Tee hee.”

     I abhor Alexa, drones and driverless cars. You too Siri. You all

terrify me.

     I just saw a video of an Amazon warehouse where robots scatter

about fulfilling all orders. I shudder to think what happens when

anyone orders a copy of my book. Will some robot shout out, “No Sheldon

7. The author hates us. Put it back on the shelf”?

    I know it would be Alexa who would blow the whistle.

    Any suggestions welcome.  If you contact me you will get a live person.

   

   


 
  

 

 
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