To Bee or Not to Bee

 Jun 25, 2018 5:00 PM
by Marcel Strigberger

     You need not be a beekeeper to read this.

     The other day I was checking out a travel book on Amazon when a large notice hit me in the face. It read something like, “You may also be interested in Beekeeping for Dummies.

     What gave Amazon that idea I have no clue. I would not even have guessed there is a book like that in that “dummies” series. I am trying to imagine who would buy it. No doubt some sap who tried playing around with bee hives and who did not fare too well. He was likely attacked by a swarm of bees while shouting at them, “Hey guys, where’s my honey? Move it, pronto” They probably stormed out buzzing mad and told him to get the book.

     I recall seeing these iconic yellow and black cover books as a kid. even bought copies of Bridge for Dummies and Chess for Dummies. A common feature in the series are those graphic icons along the way, with alert labels such as “TP”, “WARNING” and “REMEMBER”.

     I wouldn’t think one would need those alerts in Beekeeping for Dummies. I’d say they would be superfluous. I can just imagine how they read: “TIP: Bees sting”. WARNING: bees sting. REMEMBER: bees sting...dummy.”

     I can understand the dummy books for games and hobbies, computer and tech matters and investing. But some of those titles to me are over the top. Out of curiosity I Googled around and saw one, Overcoming Anxiety for Dummies. This concerns me. What happens if some of the information does not mesh with the reader? What happens to his anxiety? I doubt it would be much help even if the alert reads, “TIP: Info not helpful? It’s OK. Relax. It’s just a book.”

    The one that concerns me even more is, Anger Management for Dummies. While I commend anyone with a short fuse for reaching out for solutions, this guy expects answers and results now. I would not want to be near him at the bookstore Starbucks as he peruses the book, comes across an alert he does not like and says, “Oh yeah? So on top of that you think I’m a dummy!”

     I just hope this dude does not then pick up and purchase another title I noticed in the series, Pitbulls for Dummies.

     I did see a cute one, Ethics for Dummies. I am not sure who would own up to being unethical and buy the book. But I believe if some devious character enters Indigo or Barnes and Noble and checks out the book, there is a reasonable chance if he wants it, at least he won’t steal it.

     In all there are actually over 300 dummies titles out there. There is even one called, Feng Shui for Dummies. Given the clutter in my house, I may look into that one further. I don’t know what it says but I sense that if I do get a copy, after reading it I’d get this inexplicable urge to toss it out.

www.marcelshumour.com


 


  

 

 
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